the very first time an intimate partner puts their hands on you out of anger should be the very last time you have contact with that partner. you do not owe them forgiveness. you are not overreacting. most of the time physical abuse is not a one time thing, but even one time is fully and immensely unaccepable. please remember that there is no shame in being the one who walks away. you are not weak and you are not cruel. walk away and never look back


instead of calling someone a “grammar nazi”, why not try:

  • word nerd
  • syntax whiplash
  • fuckin geek
  • speech preacher
  • punctuate infatuate-er
  • ~Lord English~

"People are perfectly happy to see women as sex objects, but the actual biologic of our bodies is apparently gross and unmentionable."
- Our Bodies, Ourselves.


"People are perfectly happy to see women as sex objects, but the actual biologic of our bodies is apparently gross and unmentionable."

Our Bodies, Ourselves.

Anonymous asked:

What is 50 shades of grey about? And what's so bad about it?




50 Shades of Grey was originally fanfiction based on the Twilight series, which was then published as a novel (along with 2 subsequent books). It sold over 100 million copies around the world and topped best-seller lists everywhere. It’s about to be adapted into a film, set to come out early next year.

It follows a college student named Ana Steele, who enters a relationship with a man named Christian Grey and is then introduced to a bastardised and abusive parody of BDSM culture.

While the book is paraded as erotica, the relationship between Ana and Christian is far from healthy. The core mantra of the BDSM community is “safe, sane and consensual”, and 50 Shades is anything but. None of the rules of BDSM practices (which are put in place to protect those involved) are actually upheld. Christian is controlling, manipulative, abusive, takes complete advantage of Ana, ignores safe-words, ignores consent, keeps her uneducated about the sexual practices they’re taking part in, and a multitude of other terrible things. Their relationship is completely sickening and unhealthy.

Basically, “the book is a glaring glamorisation of violence against women,” as Amy Bonomi so perfectly put it. 

It’s terrible enough that a book like this has been absorbed by people worldwide. Now, we have a film that is expected to be a huge box-office success, and will likely convince countless more young women that it’s okay not to have any autonomy in a relationship, that a man is allowed to control them entirely. It will also show many young men that women are theirs to play with and dominate, thus contributing to antiquated patriarchal values and rape culture.


Boycott this fucking movie, for the love of god. These kinds of ideas are dangerous and set us back as a society 

Anonymous asked:

you dont tag trigger warnings?





i always get shit when i talk about this but the reason i dont tag tw is bc

a) the term ‘trigger’ is meant to refer 2 those with PTSD those w severe anxiety and/or survivors of various forms of abuse it indicates an extreme reaction 2 certain stimulus like a panic attack/flashback/blackout caused by ur brain being unable to handle the resurgence of something horrific that happened to u 

b) with that being said, i dont post triggering content. i havent talked about serious triggering shit on this blog for a long time in fact i think the last time i tagged smth was when i reblogged this youtube video about domestic abuse probs like 6 months ago nowadays i just reblog pretty pictures and make fun of anons 

b) i get a thousand messages everyday from ppl suggesting i should tag shit like ‘spiders, ‘blood’, ‘feet’, ‘ghosts’, etc and it seriously pisses me off that u guys really believe ‘triggering’ equals ‘it makes me uncomfortable’ im not here to make tumblr a better place for u im not even getting paid man it’s ur responsibility to take care of yourself when it comes to these random ass ‘triggers’ if u cant see a gif of a ghost on ur dash you shouldn’t be online at all

d) in fact, ive come to the conclusion that demanding one of these lame ass trigger warnings it’s just a way 2 identify yourself as even more aware even more solicitous than the person who failed to ~adequately~ provide such a ridiculous warning. when i see ppl tagging ‘tw: spiders’ i cant help but think they are not demonstrating a sensitivity towards a topic but rather they just wanna be ‘seen’ doing so 2 demand that others ‘ought’ to do the same to validate one’s politics. this whole ’trigger’ business is less about protecting ppl from potentially re-traumatizing events and more 2 do with flagging up your right-on credentials even if it means silencing those who have actually gone through actual traumatizing events.

1. As someone with PTSD amongst other disorders, I assure you that is categorically untrue. Trigger is a term used by psychologists that refer to things including but not limited to: things that cause depressive and manic spirals, things that cause panic attacks (including phobias, like arachnophobia), things that cause suicidal ideation, things that cause self harm cravings, disordered eating cravings, dysphoric episodes, dissociation, dysmorphia, and self destructive behaviours. It’s used much the same way by the tumblr community who, by and large, encountered it’s use first through psychologists and therapists and decided to spread this to tumblr to create a safe space.

2. If someone has asked for a trigger warning, you’ve probably posted triggering content. You don’t know other people’s triggers. In fact, even restricted to PTSD, triggers can be odd precise things that have very personal associations (sometimes even associations the sufferer can’t understand) to the trauma they have suffered. That can even extend as far as colours!

3. Saying that people shouldn’t exist in spaces because they suffer from extreme mental health issues is outright ableist. Including odd phobias! That simple.

4. Trigger warnings can create an environment that is inaccessible to those who are uneducated on them, yes. That can become classist, ableist and exclusive. The way to deal with this is to educate people, not to throw the concept out the window.

And this is also a reminder that if you think someone is too sensitive you do NOT deliberately expose them to things to get past that, which is what you do when you refuse to tag people’s phobias. Because blacklists. YOU DO NOT PERFORM PSYCHOTHERAPY WITHOUT SOMEONES CONSENT.